A Midsummer Night’s Dream

1 The Queen of Fairies still lying asleep.
2 Enter Bottom, Quince, Snout, Starveling, Snug and Flute.
3 BOTTOM.
4 Are we all met?
5 QUINCE.
6 Pat, pat; and here’s a marvellous convenient place for our rehearsal.
7 This green plot shall be our stage, this hawthorn brake our
8 tiring-house; and we will do it in action, as we will do it before the
9 Duke.
10 BOTTOM.
11 Peter Quince?
12 QUINCE.
13 What sayest thou, bully Bottom?
14 BOTTOM.
15 There are things in this comedy of Pyramus and Thisbe that will never
16 please. First, Pyramus must draw a sword to kill himself; which the
17 ladies cannot abide. How answer you that?
18 SNOUT
19 By’r lakin, a parlous fear.
20 STARVELING.
21 I believe we must leave the killing out, when all is done.
22 BOTTOM.
23 Not a whit; I have a device to make all well. Write me a prologue, and
24 let the prologue seem to say we will do no harm with our swords, and
25 that Pyramus is not killed indeed; and for the more better assurance,
26 tell them that I Pyramus am not Pyramus but Bottom the weaver. This
27 will put them out of fear.
28 QUINCE.
29 Well, we will have such a prologue; and it shall be written in eight
30 and six.
31 BOTTOM.
32 No, make it two more; let it be written in eight and eight.
33 SNOUT
34 Will not the ladies be afeard of the lion?
35 STARVELING.
36 I fear it, I promise you.
37 BOTTOM.
38 Masters, you ought to consider with yourselves, to bring in (God shield
39 us!) a lion among ladies is a most dreadful thing. For there is not a
40 more fearful wild-fowl than your lion living; and we ought to look to
41 it.
42 SNOUT
43 Therefore another prologue must tell he is not a lion.
44 BOTTOM.
45 Nay, you must name his name, and half his face must be seen through the
46 lion’s neck; and he himself must speak through, saying thus, or to the
47 same defect: ‘Ladies,’ or, ‘Fair ladies, I would wish you,’ or, ‘I
48 would request you,’ or, ’I would entreat you, not to fear, not to
49 tremble: my life for yours. If you think I come hither as a lion, it
50 were pity of my life. No, I am no such thing; I am a man as other men
51 are’: and there, indeed, let him name his name, and tell them plainly
52 he is Snug the joiner.
53 QUINCE.
54 Well, it shall be so. But there is two hard things: that is, to bring
55 the moonlight into a chamber, for you know, Pyramus and Thisbe meet by
56 moonlight.
57 SNOUT
58 Doth the moon shine that night we play our play?
59 BOTTOM.
60 A calendar, a calendar! Look in the almanack; find out moonshine, find
61 out moonshine.
62 QUINCE.
63 Yes, it doth shine that night.
64 BOTTOM.
65 Why, then may you leave a casement of the great chamber window, where
66 we play, open; and the moon may shine in at the casement.
67 QUINCE.
68 Ay; or else one must come in with a bush of thorns and a lantern, and
69 say he comes to disfigure or to present the person of Moonshine. Then
70 there is another thing: we must have a wall in the great chamber; for
71 Pyramus and Thisbe, says the story, did talk through the chink of a
72 wall.
73 SNOUT
74 You can never bring in a wall. What say you, Bottom?
75 BOTTOM.
76 Some man or other must present Wall. And let him have some plaster, or
77 some loam, or some rough-cast about him, to signify wall; and let him
78 hold his fingers thus, and through that cranny shall Pyramus and Thisbe
79 whisper.
80 QUINCE.
81 If that may be, then all is well. Come, sit down, every mother’s son,
82 and rehearse your parts. Pyramus, you begin: when you have spoken your
83 speech, enter into that brake; and so everyone according to his cue.
84 Enter Puck behind.
85 PUCK.
86 What hempen homespuns have we swaggering here,
87 So near the cradle of the Fairy Queen?
88 What, a play toward? I’ll be an auditor;
89 An actor too perhaps, if I see cause.
90 QUINCE.
91 Speak, Pyramus.—Thisbe, stand forth.
92 PYRAMUS.
93 _Thisbe, the flowers of odious savours sweet_
94 QUINCE.
95 Odours, odours.
96 PYRAMUS.
97 _. . . odours savours sweet.
98 So hath thy breath, my dearest Thisbe dear.
99 But hark, a voice! Stay thou but here awhile,
100 And by and by I will to thee appear._
101 [_Exit._]
102 PUCK.
103 A stranger Pyramus than e’er played here!
104 [_Exit._]
105 THISBE.
106 Must I speak now?
107 QUINCE.
108 Ay, marry, must you, For you must understand he goes but to see a noise
109 that he heard, and is to come again.
110 THISBE.
111 _Most radiant Pyramus, most lily-white of hue,
112 Of colour like the red rose on triumphant brier,
113 Most brisky juvenal, and eke most lovely Jew,
114 As true as truest horse, that yet would never tire,
115 I’ll meet thee, Pyramus, at Ninny’s tomb._
116 QUINCE.
117 Ninus’ tomb, man! Why, you must not speak that yet. That you answer to
118 Pyramus. You speak all your part at once, cues, and all.—Pyramus enter!
119 Your cue is past; it is ‘never tire.’
120 THISBE.
121 O, _As true as truest horse, that yet would never tire._
122 Enter Puck and Bottom with an ass’s head.
123 PYRAMUS.
124 _If I were fair, Thisbe, I were only thine._
125 QUINCE.
126 O monstrous! O strange! We are haunted. Pray, masters, fly, masters!
127 Help!
128 [_Exeunt Clowns._]
129 PUCK.
130 I’ll follow you. I’ll lead you about a round,
131 Through bog, through bush, through brake, through brier;
132 Sometime a horse I’ll be, sometime a hound,
133 A hog, a headless bear, sometime a fire;
134 And neigh, and bark, and grunt, and roar, and burn,
135 Like horse, hound, hog, bear, fire, at every turn.
136 [_Exit._]
137 BOTTOM.
138 Why do they run away? This is a knavery of them to make me afeard.
139 Enter Snout.
140 SNOUT
141 O Bottom, thou art changed! What do I see on thee?
142 BOTTOM.
143 What do you see? You see an ass-head of your own, do you?
144 [_Exit Snout._]
145 Enter Quince.
146 QUINCE.
147 Bless thee, Bottom! bless thee! Thou art translated.
148 [_Exit._]
149 BOTTOM.
150 I see their knavery. This is to make an ass of me, to fright me, if
151 they could. But I will not stir from this place, do what they can. I
152 will walk up and down here, and I will sing, that they shall hear I am
153 not afraid.
154 [_Sings._]
155 The ousel cock, so black of hue,
156 With orange-tawny bill,
157 The throstle with his note so true,
158 The wren with little quill.
159 TITANIA.
160 [_Waking._] What angel wakes me from my flowery bed?
161 BOTTOM.
162 [_Sings._]
163 The finch, the sparrow, and the lark,
164 The plain-song cuckoo gray,
165 Whose note full many a man doth mark,
166 And dares not answer nay.
167 for, indeed, who would set his wit to so foolish a bird? Who would give
168 a bird the lie, though he cry ‘cuckoo’ never so?
169 TITANIA.
170 I pray thee, gentle mortal, sing again.
171 Mine ear is much enamour’d of thy note.
172 So is mine eye enthrallèd to thy shape;
173 And thy fair virtue’s force perforce doth move me,
174 On the first view, to say, to swear, I love thee.
175 BOTTOM.
176 Methinks, mistress, you should have little reason for that. And yet, to
177 say the truth, reason and love keep little company together nowadays.
178 The more the pity that some honest neighbours will not make them
179 friends. Nay, I can gleek upon occasion.
180 TITANIA.
181 Thou art as wise as thou art beautiful.
182 BOTTOM.
183 Not so, neither; but if I had wit enough to get out of this wood, I
184 have enough to serve mine own turn.
185 TITANIA.
186 Out of this wood do not desire to go.
187 Thou shalt remain here whether thou wilt or no.
188 I am a spirit of no common rate.
189 The summer still doth tend upon my state;
190 And I do love thee: therefore, go with me.
191 I’ll give thee fairies to attend on thee;
192 And they shall fetch thee jewels from the deep,
193 And sing, while thou on pressèd flowers dost sleep.
194 And I will purge thy mortal grossness so
195 That thou shalt like an airy spirit go.—
196 Peaseblossom! Cobweb! Moth! and Mustardseed!
197 Enter four Fairies.
198 PEASEBLOSSOM.
199 Ready.
200 COBWEB.
201 And I.
202 MOTH.
203 And I.
204 MUSTARDSEED.
205 And I.
206 ALL.
207 Where shall we go?
208 TITANIA.
209 Be kind and courteous to this gentleman;
210 Hop in his walks and gambol in his eyes;
211 Feed him with apricocks and dewberries,
212 With purple grapes, green figs, and mulberries;
213 The honey-bags steal from the humble-bees,
214 And for night-tapers, crop their waxen thighs,
215 And light them at the fiery glow-worm’s eyes,
216 To have my love to bed and to arise;
217 And pluck the wings from painted butterflies,
218 To fan the moonbeams from his sleeping eyes.
219 Nod to him, elves, and do him courtesies.
220 PEASEBLOSSOM.
221 Hail, mortal!
222 COBWEB.
223 Hail!
224 MOTH.
225 Hail!
226 MUSTARDSEED.
227 Hail!
228 BOTTOM.
229 I cry your worships mercy, heartily.—I beseech your worship’s name.
230 COBWEB.
231 Cobweb.
232 BOTTOM.
233 I shall desire you of more acquaintance, good Master Cobweb. If I cut
234 my finger, I shall make bold with you.—Your name, honest gentleman?
235 PEASEBLOSSOM.
236 Peaseblossom.
237 BOTTOM.
238 I pray you, commend me to Mistress Squash, your mother, and to Master
239 Peascod, your father. Good Master Peaseblossom, I shall desire you of
240 more acquaintance too.—Your name, I beseech you, sir?
241 MUSTARDSEED.
242 Mustardseed.
243 BOTTOM.
244 Good Master Mustardseed, I know your patience well. That same cowardly
245 giant-like ox-beef hath devoured many a gentleman of your house. I
246 promise you, your kindred hath made my eyes water ere now. I desire you
247 of more acquaintance, good Master Mustardseed.
248 TITANIA.
249 Come, wait upon him; lead him to my bower.
250 The moon, methinks, looks with a watery eye,
251 And when she weeps, weeps every little flower,
252 Lamenting some enforced chastity.
253 Tie up my love’s tongue, bring him silently.
254 [_Exeunt._]