A Midsummer Night’s Dream

1 Enter Quince, Flute, Snout and Starveling.
2 QUINCE.
3 Have you sent to Bottom’s house? Is he come home yet?
4 STARVELING.
5 He cannot be heard of. Out of doubt he is transported.
6 FLUTE.
7 If he come not, then the play is marred. It goes not forward, doth it?
8 QUINCE.
9 It is not possible. You have not a man in all Athens able to discharge
10 Pyramus but he.
11 FLUTE.
12 No, he hath simply the best wit of any handicraft man in Athens.
13 QUINCE.
14 Yea, and the best person too, and he is a very paramour for a sweet
15 voice.
16 FLUTE.
17 You must say paragon. A paramour is, God bless us, a thing of naught.
18 Enter Snug.
19 SNUG
20 Masters, the Duke is coming from the temple, and there is two or three
21 lords and ladies more married. If our sport had gone forward, we had
22 all been made men.
23 FLUTE.
24 O sweet bully Bottom! Thus hath he lost sixpence a day during his life;
25 he could not have ’scaped sixpence a day. An the Duke had not given him
26 sixpence a day for playing Pyramus, I’ll be hanged. He would have
27 deserved it: sixpence a day in Pyramus, or nothing.
28 Enter Bottom.
29 BOTTOM.
30 Where are these lads? Where are these hearts?
31 QUINCE.
32 Bottom! O most courageous day! O most happy hour!
33 BOTTOM.
34 Masters, I am to discourse wonders: but ask me not what; for if I tell
35 you, I am not true Athenian. I will tell you everything, right as it
36 fell out.
37 QUINCE.
38 Let us hear, sweet Bottom.
39 BOTTOM.
40 Not a word of me. All that I will tell you is, that the Duke hath
41 dined. Get your apparel together, good strings to your beards, new
42 ribbons to your pumps; meet presently at the palace; every man look
43 o’er his part. For the short and the long is, our play is preferred. In
44 any case, let Thisbe have clean linen; and let not him that plays the
45 lion pare his nails, for they shall hang out for the lion’s claws. And
46 most dear actors, eat no onions nor garlick, for we are to utter sweet
47 breath; and I do not doubt but to hear them say it is a sweet comedy.
48 No more words. Away! Go, away!
49 [_Exeunt._]