As You Like It

1 Enter Rosalind and Celia.
2 ROSALIND.
3 Never talk to me, I will weep.
4 CELIA.
5 Do, I prithee, but yet have the grace to consider that tears do not
6 become a man.
7 ROSALIND.
8 But have I not cause to weep?
9 CELIA.
10 As good cause as one would desire; therefore weep.
11 ROSALIND.
12 His very hair is of the dissembling colour.
13 CELIA.
14 Something browner than Judas’s. Marry, his kisses are Judas’s own
15 children.
16 ROSALIND.
17 I’ faith, his hair is of a good colour.
18 CELIA.
19 An excellent colour. Your chestnut was ever the only colour.
20 ROSALIND.
21 And his kissing is as full of sanctity as the touch of holy bread.
22 CELIA.
23 He hath bought a pair of cast lips of Diana. A nun of winter’s
24 sisterhood kisses not more religiously; the very ice of chastity is in
25 them.
26 ROSALIND.
27 But why did he swear he would come this morning, and comes not?
28 CELIA.
29 Nay, certainly, there is no truth in him.
30 ROSALIND.
31 Do you think so?
32 CELIA.
33 Yes. I think he is not a pick-purse nor a horse-stealer, but for his
34 verity in love, I do think him as concave as a covered goblet or a
35 worm-eaten nut.
36 ROSALIND.
37 Not true in love?
38 CELIA.
39 Yes, when he is in, but I think he is not in.
40 ROSALIND.
41 You have heard him swear downright he was.
42 CELIA.
43 “Was” is not “is”. Besides, the oath of a lover is no stronger than the
44 word of a tapster. They are both the confirmer of false reckonings. He
45 attends here in the forest on the Duke your father.
46 ROSALIND.
47 I met the Duke yesterday, and had much question with him. He asked me
48 of what parentage I was. I told him, of as good as he, so he laughed
49 and let me go. But what talk we of fathers when there is such a man as
50 Orlando?
51 CELIA.
52 O, that’s a brave man! He writes brave verses, speaks brave words,
53 swears brave oaths, and breaks them bravely, quite traverse, athwart
54 the heart of his lover, as a puny tilter, that spurs his horse but on
55 one side, breaks his staff like a noble goose. But all’s brave that
56 youth mounts and folly guides. Who comes here?
57 Enter Corin.
58 CORIN.
59 Mistress and master, you have oft enquired
60 After the shepherd that complained of love,
61 Who you saw sitting by me on the turf,
62 Praising the proud disdainful shepherdess
63 That was his mistress.
64 CELIA.
65 Well, and what of him?
66 CORIN.
67 If you will see a pageant truly played
68 Between the pale complexion of true love
69 And the red glow of scorn and proud disdain,
70 Go hence a little, and I shall conduct you,
71 If you will mark it.
72 ROSALIND.
73 O, come, let us remove.
74 The sight of lovers feedeth those in love.
75 Bring us to this sight, and you shall say
76 I’ll prove a busy actor in their play.
77 [_Exeunt._]