The Life Of Timon Of Athens

1 Music. Enter divers Friends at several doors.
2 FIRST FRIEND.
3 The good time of day to you, sir.
4 SECOND FRIEND.
5 I also wish it to you. I think this honourable lord did but try us this
6 other day.
7 FIRST FRIEND.
8 Upon that were my thoughts tiring when we encountered. I hope it is not
9 so low with him as he made it seem in the trial of his several friends.
10 SECOND FRIEND.
11 It should not be, by the persuasion of his new feasting.
12 FIRST FRIEND.
13 I should think so. He hath sent me an earnest inviting, which many my
14 near occasions did urge me to put off; but he hath conjured me beyond
15 them, and I must needs appear.
16 SECOND FRIEND.
17 In like manner was I in debt to my importunate business, but he would
18 not hear my excuse. I am sorry, when he sent to borrow of me, that my
19 provision was out.
20 FIRST FRIEND.
21 I am sick of that grief too, as I understand how all things go.
22 SECOND FRIEND.
23 Every man here’s so. What would he have borrowed you?
24 FIRST FRIEND.
25 A thousand pieces.
26 SECOND FRIEND.
27 A thousand pieces!
28 FIRST FRIEND.
29 What of you?
30 SECOND FRIEND.
31 He sent to me, sir—here he comes.
32 Enter Timon and Attendants.
33 TIMON.
34 With all my heart, gentlemen both! And how fare you?
35 FIRST FRIEND.
36 Ever at the best, hearing well of your lordship.
37 SECOND FRIEND.
38 The swallow follows not summer more willing than we your lordship.
39 TIMON.
40 [_Aside_.] Nor more willingly leaves winter, such summer birds are men.
41 Gentlemen, our dinner will not recompense this long stay. Feast your
42 ears with the music awhile, if they will fare so harshly o’ th’
43 trumpet’s sound; we shall to’t presently.
44 FIRST FRIEND.
45 I hope it remains not unkindly with your lordship that I returned you
46 an empty messenger.
47 TIMON.
48 O, sir, let it not trouble you.
49 SECOND FRIEND.
50 My noble lord—
51 TIMON.
52 Ah, my good friend, what cheer?
53 SECOND FRIEND.
54 My most honourable lord, I am e’en sick of shame that when your
55 lordship this other day sent to me I was so unfortunate a beggar.
56 TIMON.
57 Think not on’t, sir.
58 SECOND FRIEND.
59 If you had sent but two hours before—
60 TIMON.
61 Let it not cumber your better remembrance.
62 [_The banquet brought in._]
63 Come, bring in all together.
64 SECOND FRIEND.
65 All covered dishes!
66 FIRST FRIEND.
67 Royal cheer, I warrant you.
68 THIRD FRIEND.
69 Doubt not that, if money and the season can yield it.
70 FIRST FRIEND.
71 How do you? What’s the news?
72 THIRD FRIEND.
73 Alcibiades is banished. Hear you of it?
74 FIRST AND SECOND FRIENDS.
75 Alcibiades banished?
76 THIRD FRIEND.
77 ’Tis so, be sure of it.
78 FIRST FRIEND.
79 How, how?
80 SECOND FRIEND.
81 I pray you, upon what?
82 TIMON.
83 My worthy friends, will you draw near?
84 THIRD FRIEND.
85 I’ll tell you more anon. Here’s a noble feast toward.
86 SECOND FRIEND.
87 This is the old man still.
88 THIRD FRIEND.
89 Will’t hold, will’t hold?
90 SECOND FRIEND.
91 It does, but time will—and so—
92 THIRD FRIEND.
93 I do conceive.
94 TIMON.
95 Each man to his stool with that spur as he would to the lip of his
96 mistress. Your diet shall be in all places alike. Make not a city feast
97 of it, to let the meat cool ere we can agree upon the first place. Sit,
98 sit. The gods require our thanks:
99 You great benefactors, sprinkle our society with thankfulness. For your
100 own gifts make yourselves praised, but reserve still to give, lest your
101 deities be despised. Lend to each man enough, that one need not lend to
102 another; for, were your godheads to borrow of men, men would forsake
103 the gods. Make the meat be beloved more than the man that gives it. Let
104 no assembly of twenty be without a score of villains. If there sit
105 twelve women at the table, let a dozen of them be as they are. The rest
106 of your foes, O gods, the senators of Athens, together with the common
107 lag of people, what is amiss in them, you gods, make suitable for
108 destruction. For these my present friends, as they are to me nothing,
109 so in nothing bless them, and to nothing are they welcome.
110 Uncover, dogs, and lap.
111 [_The dishes are uncovered and prove to be full of lukewarm water._]
112 SOME SPEAK.
113 What does his lordship mean?
114 SOME OTHER.
115 I know not.
116 TIMON.
117 May you a better feast never behold,
118 You knot of mouth-friends! Smoke and lukewarm water
119 Is your perfection. This is Timon’s last,
120 Who, stuck and spangled with your flatteries,
121 Washes it off and sprinkles in your faces
122 Your reeking villainy.
123 [_Throws water in their faces._]
124 Live loathed, and long,
125 Most smiling, smooth, detested parasites,
126 Courteous destroyers, affable wolves, meek bears,
127 You fools of fortune, trencher-friends, time’s flies,
128 Cap-and-knee slaves, vapours, and minute-jacks!
129 Of man and beast the infinite malady
130 Crust you quite o’er! [_They stand_.] What, dost thou go?
131 Soft! Take thy physic first; thou too, and thou!
132 Stay, I will lend thee money, borrow none.
133 [_He attacks them and forces them out._]
134 What, all in motion? Henceforth be no feast
135 Whereat a villain’s not a welcome guest.
136 Burn, house! Sink Athens! Henceforth hated be
137 Of Timon man and all humanity!
138 [_Exit._]
139 Enter Timon’s Friends, the Senators with other Lords.
140 FIRST FRIEND.
141 How now, my lords?
142 SECOND FRIEND.
143 Know you the quality of Lord Timon’s fury?
144 THIRD FRIEND.
145 Push! Did you see my cap?
146 FOURTH FRIEND.
147 I have lost my gown.
148 FIRST FRIEND.
149 He’s but a mad lord, and nought but humours sways him. He gave me a
150 jewel th’ other day, and now he has beat it out of my hat. Did you see
151 my jewel?
152 THIRD FRIEND.
153 Did you see my cap?
154 SECOND FRIEND.
155 Here ’tis.
156 FOURTH FRIEND.
157 Here lies my gown.
158 FIRST FRIEND.
159 Let’s make no stay.
160 SECOND FRIEND.
161 Lord Timon’s mad.
162 THIRD FRIEND.
163 I feel’t upon my bones.
164 FOURTH FRIEND.
165 One day he gives us diamonds, next day stones.
166 [_Exeunt._]