Troilus And Cressida

1 Flourish. Enter Agamemnon, Ulysses, Diomedes, Nestor, Ajax, Menelaus
2 and Calchas.
3 CALCHAS.
4 Now, Princes, for the service I have done,
5 Th’advantage of the time prompts me aloud
6 To call for recompense. Appear it to your mind
7 That, through the sight I bear in things to come,
8 I have abandon’d Troy, left my possession,
9 Incurr’d a traitor’s name, expos’d myself
10 From certain and possess’d conveniences
11 To doubtful fortunes, sequest’ring from me all
12 That time, acquaintance, custom, and condition,
13 Made tame and most familiar to my nature;
14 And here, to do you service, am become
15 As new into the world, strange, unacquainted—
16 I do beseech you, as in way of taste,
17 To give me now a little benefit
18 Out of those many regist’red in promise,
19 Which you say live to come in my behalf.
20 AGAMEMNON.
21 What wouldst thou of us, Trojan? Make demand.
22 CALCHAS.
23 You have a Trojan prisoner call’d Antenor,
24 Yesterday took; Troy holds him very dear.
25 Oft have you—often have you thanks therefore—
26 Desir’d my Cressid in right great exchange,
27 Whom Troy hath still denied; but this Antenor,
28 I know, is such a wrest in their affairs
29 That their negotiations all must slack
30 Wanting his manage; and they will almost
31 Give us a prince of blood, a son of Priam,
32 In change of him. Let him be sent, great Princes,
33 And he shall buy my daughter; and her presence
34 Shall quite strike off all service I have done
35 In most accepted pain.
36 AGAMEMNON.
37 Let Diomedes bear him,
38 And bring us Cressid hither. Calchas shall have
39 What he requests of us. Good Diomed,
40 Furnish you fairly for this interchange;
41 Withal, bring word if Hector will tomorrow
42 Be answer’d in his challenge. Ajax is ready.
43 DIOMEDES.
44 This shall I undertake; and ’tis a burden
45 Which I am proud to bear.
46 [_Exeunt Diomedes and Calchas_.]
47 [_Achilles and Patroclus stand in their tent_.]
48 ULYSSES.
49 Achilles stands i’ th’entrance of his tent.
50 Please it our general pass strangely by him,
51 As if he were forgot; and, Princes all,
52 Lay negligent and loose regard upon him.
53 I will come last. ’Tis like he’ll question me
54 Why such unplausive eyes are bent, why turn’d on him.
55 If so, I have derision med’cinable
56 To use between your strangeness and his pride,
57 Which his own will shall have desire to drink.
58 It may do good. Pride hath no other glass
59 To show itself but pride; for supple knees
60 Feed arrogance and are the proud man’s fees.
61 AGAMEMNON.
62 We’ll execute your purpose, and put on
63 A form of strangeness as we pass along.
64 So do each lord; and either greet him not,
65 Or else disdainfully, which shall shake him more
66 Than if not look’d on. I will lead the way.
67 ACHILLES.
68 What comes the general to speak with me?
69 You know my mind. I’ll fight no more ’gainst Troy.
70 AGAMEMNON.
71 What says Achilles? Would he aught with us?
72 NESTOR.
73 Would you, my lord, aught with the general?
74 ACHILLES.
75 No.
76 NESTOR.
77 Nothing, my lord.
78 AGAMEMNON.
79 The better.
80 [_Exeunt Agamemnon and Nestor_.]
81 ACHILLES.
82 Good day, good day.
83 MENELAUS.
84 How do you? How do you?
85 [_Exit_.]
86 ACHILLES.
87 What, does the cuckold scorn me?
88 AJAX.
89 How now, Patroclus?
90 ACHILLES.
91 Good morrow, Ajax.
92 AJAX.
93 Ha?
94 ACHILLES.
95 Good morrow.
96 AJAX.
97 Ay, and good next day too.
98 [_Exit_.]
99 ACHILLES.
100 What mean these fellows? Know they not Achilles?
101 PATROCLUS.
102 They pass by strangely. They were us’d to bend,
103 To send their smiles before them to Achilles,
104 To come as humbly as they us’d to creep
105 To holy altars.
106 ACHILLES.
107 What, am I poor of late?
108 ’Tis certain, greatness, once fall’n out with fortune,
109 Must fall out with men too. What the declin’d is,
110 He shall as soon read in the eyes of others
111 As feel in his own fall; for men, like butterflies,
112 Show not their mealy wings but to the summer;
113 And not a man for being simply man
114 Hath any honour, but honour for those honours
115 That are without him, as place, riches, and favour,
116 Prizes of accident, as oft as merit;
117 Which when they fall, as being slippery standers,
118 The love that lean’d on them as slippery too,
119 Doth one pluck down another, and together
120 Die in the fall. But ’tis not so with me:
121 Fortune and I are friends; I do enjoy
122 At ample point all that I did possess
123 Save these men’s looks; who do, methinks, find out
124 Something not worth in me such rich beholding
125 As they have often given. Here is Ulysses.
126 I’ll interrupt his reading.
127 How now, Ulysses!
128 ULYSSES.
129 Now, great Thetis’ son!
130 ACHILLES.
131 What are you reading?
132 ULYSSES.
133 A strange fellow here
134 Writes me that man—how dearly ever parted,
135 How much in having, or without or in—
136 Cannot make boast to have that which he hath,
137 Nor feels not what he owes, but by reflection;
138 As when his virtues shining upon others
139 Heat them, and they retort that heat again
140 To the first giver.
141 ACHILLES.
142 This is not strange, Ulysses.
143 The beauty that is borne here in the face
144 The bearer knows not, but commends itself
145 To others’ eyes; nor doth the eye itself—
146 That most pure spirit of sense—behold itself,
147 Not going from itself; but eye to eye opposed
148 Salutes each other with each other’s form;
149 For speculation turns not to itself
150 Till it hath travell’d, and is mirror’d there
151 Where it may see itself. This is not strange at all.
152 ULYSSES.
153 I do not strain at the position—
154 It is familiar—but at the author’s drift;
155 Who, in his circumstance, expressly proves
156 That no man is the lord of anything,
157 Though in and of him there be much consisting,
158 Till he communicate his parts to others;
159 Nor doth he of himself know them for aught
160 Till he behold them formed in the applause
161 Where th’are extended; who, like an arch, reverb’rate
162 The voice again; or, like a gate of steel
163 Fronting the sun, receives and renders back
164 His figure and his heat. I was much rapt in this;
165 And apprehended here immediately
166 Th’unknown Ajax. Heavens, what a man is there!
167 A very horse that has he knows not what!
168 Nature, what things there are
169 Most abject in regard and dear in use!
170 What things again most dear in the esteem
171 And poor in worth! Now shall we see tomorrow—
172 An act that very chance doth throw upon him—
173 Ajax renown’d. O heavens, what some men do,
174 While some men leave to do!
175 How some men creep in skittish Fortune’s hall,
176 Whiles others play the idiots in her eyes!
177 How one man eats into another’s pride,
178 While pride is fasting in his wantonness!
179 To see these Grecian lords!—why, even already
180 They clap the lubber Ajax on the shoulder,
181 As if his foot were on brave Hector’s breast,
182 And great Troy shrieking.
183 ACHILLES.
184 I do believe it; for they pass’d by me
185 As misers do by beggars, neither gave to me
186 Good word nor look. What, are my deeds forgot?
187 ULYSSES.
188 Time hath, my lord, a wallet at his back,
189 Wherein he puts alms for oblivion,
190 A great-siz’d monster of ingratitudes.
191 Those scraps are good deeds past, which are devour’d
192 As fast as they are made, forgot as soon
193 As done. Perseverance, dear my lord,
194 Keeps honour bright. To have done is to hang
195 Quite out of fashion, like a rusty mail
196 In monumental mock’ry. Take the instant way;
197 For honour travels in a strait so narrow—
198 Where one but goes abreast. Keep then the path,
199 For emulation hath a thousand sons
200 That one by one pursue; if you give way,
201 Or hedge aside from the direct forthright,
202 Like to an ent’red tide they all rush by
203 And leave you hindmost;
204 Or, like a gallant horse fall’n in first rank,
205 Lie there for pavement to the abject rear,
206 O’er-run and trampled on. Then what they do in present,
207 Though less than yours in past, must o’ertop yours;
208 For Time is like a fashionable host,
209 That slightly shakes his parting guest by th’hand;
210 And with his arms out-stretch’d, as he would fly,
211 Grasps in the comer. The welcome ever smiles,
212 And farewell goes out sighing. O, let not virtue seek
213 Remuneration for the thing it was;
214 For beauty, wit,
215 High birth, vigour of bone, desert in service,
216 Love, friendship, charity, are subjects all
217 To envious and calumniating Time.
218 One touch of nature makes the whole world kin—
219 That all with one consent praise new-born gauds,
220 Though they are made and moulded of things past,
221 And give to dust that is a little gilt
222 More laud than gilt o’er-dusted.
223 The present eye praises the present object.
224 Then marvel not, thou great and complete man,
225 That all the Greeks begin to worship Ajax,
226 Since things in motion sooner catch the eye
227 Than what stirs not. The cry went once on thee,
228 And still it might, and yet it may again,
229 If thou wouldst not entomb thyself alive
230 And case thy reputation in thy tent,
231 Whose glorious deeds but in these fields of late
232 Made emulous missions ’mongst the gods themselves,
233 And drave great Mars to faction.
234 ACHILLES.
235 Of this my privacy
236 I have strong reasons.
237 ULYSSES.
238 But ’gainst your privacy
239 The reasons are more potent and heroical.
240 ’Tis known, Achilles, that you are in love
241 With one of Priam’s daughters.
242 ACHILLES.
243 Ha! known!
244 ULYSSES.
245 Is that a wonder?
246 The providence that’s in a watchful state
247 Knows almost every grain of Plutus’ gold;
248 Finds bottom in th’uncomprehensive deeps;
249 Keeps place with thought, and almost, like the gods,
250 Do thoughts unveil in their dumb cradles.
251 There is a mystery—with whom relation
252 Durst never meddle—in the soul of state,
253 Which hath an operation more divine
254 Than breath or pen can give expressure to.
255 All the commerce that you have had with Troy
256 As perfectly is ours as yours, my lord;
257 And better would it fit Achilles much
258 To throw down Hector than Polyxena.
259 But it must grieve young Pyrrhus now at home,
260 When fame shall in our island sound her trump,
261 And all the Greekish girls shall tripping sing
262 ‘Great Hector’s sister did Achilles win;
263 But our great Ajax bravely beat down him.’
264 Farewell, my lord. I as your lover speak.
265 The fool slides o’er the ice that you should break.
266 [_Exit_.]
267 PATROCLUS.
268 To this effect, Achilles, have I mov’d you.
269 A woman impudent and mannish grown
270 Is not more loath’d than an effeminate man
271 In time of action. I stand condemn’d for this;
272 They think my little stomach to the war
273 And your great love to me restrains you thus.
274 Sweet, rouse yourself; and the weak wanton Cupid
275 Shall from your neck unloose his amorous fold,
276 And, like a dew-drop from the lion’s mane,
277 Be shook to air.
278 ACHILLES.
279 Shall Ajax fight with Hector?
280 PATROCLUS.
281 Ay, and perhaps receive much honour by him.
282 ACHILLES.
283 I see my reputation is at stake;
284 My fame is shrewdly gor’d.
285 PATROCLUS.
286 O, then, beware:
287 Those wounds heal ill that men do give themselves;
288 Omission to do what is necessary
289 Seals a commission to a blank of danger;
290 And danger, like an ague, subtly taints
291 Even then when they sit idly in the sun.
292 ACHILLES.
293 Go call Thersites hither, sweet Patroclus.
294 I’ll send the fool to Ajax, and desire him
295 T’invite the Trojan lords, after the combat,
296 To see us here unarm’d. I have a woman’s longing,
297 An appetite that I am sick withal,
298 To see great Hector in his weeds of peace;
299 To talk with him, and to behold his visage,
300 Even to my full of view.
301 Enter Thersites.
302 A labour sav’d!
303 THERSITES.
304 A wonder!
305 ACHILLES.
306 What?
307 THERSITES.
308 Ajax goes up and down the field asking for himself.
309 ACHILLES.
310 How so?
311 THERSITES.
312 He must fight singly tomorrow with Hector, and is so prophetically
313 proud of an heroical cudgelling that he raves in saying nothing.
314 ACHILLES.
315 How can that be?
316 THERSITES.
317 Why, a’ stalks up and down like a peacock—a stride and a stand;
318 ruminates like an hostess that hath no arithmetic but her brain to set
319 down her reckoning, bites his lip with a politic regard, as who should
320 say ‘There were wit in this head, and ’twould out’; and so there is;
321 but it lies as coldly in him as fire in a flint, which will not show
322 without knocking. The man’s undone for ever; for if Hector break not
323 his neck i’ th’ combat, he’ll break’t himself in vainglory. He knows
324 not me. I said ‘Good morrow, Ajax’; and he replies ‘Thanks, Agamemnon.’
325 What think you of this man that takes me for the general? He’s grown a
326 very land fish, languageless, a monster. A plague of opinion! A man may
327 wear it on both sides, like leather jerkin.
328 ACHILLES.
329 Thou must be my ambassador to him, Thersites.
330 THERSITES.
331 Who, I? Why, he’ll answer nobody; he professes not answering. Speaking
332 is for beggars: he wears his tongue in’s arms. I will put on his
333 presence. Let Patroclus make his demands to me, you shall see the
334 pageant of Ajax.
335 ACHILLES.
336 To him, Patroclus. Tell him I humbly desire the valiant Ajax to invite
337 the most valorous Hector to come unarm’d to my tent; and to procure
338 safe conduct for his person of the magnanimous and most illustrious
339 six-or-seven-times-honour’d Captain General of the Grecian army,
340 Agamemnon. Do this.
341 PATROCLUS.
342 Jove bless great Ajax!
343 THERSITES.
344 Hum!
345 PATROCLUS.
346 I come from the worthy Achilles—
347 THERSITES.
348 Ha!
349 PATROCLUS.
350 Who most humbly desires you to invite Hector to his tent—
351 THERSITES.
352 Hum!
353 PATROCLUS.
354 And to procure safe conduct from Agamemnon.
355 THERSITES.
356 Agamemnon?
357 PATROCLUS.
358 Ay, my lord.
359 THERSITES.
360 Ha!
361 PATROCLUS.
362 What you say to’t?
363 THERSITES.
364 God buy you, with all my heart.
365 PATROCLUS.
366 Your answer, sir.
367 THERSITES.
368 If tomorrow be a fair day, by eleven of the clock it will go one way or
369 other. Howsoever, he shall pay for me ere he has me.
370 PATROCLUS.
371 Your answer, sir.
372 THERSITES.
373 Fare ye well, with all my heart.
374 ACHILLES.
375 Why, but he is not in this tune, is he?
376 THERSITES.
377 No, but out of tune thus. What music will be in him when Hector has
378 knock’d out his brains, I know not; but, I am sure, none; unless the
379 fiddler Apollo get his sinews to make catlings on.
380 ACHILLES.
381 Come, thou shalt bear a letter to him straight.
382 THERSITES.
383 Let me bear another to his horse; for that’s the more capable creature.
384 ACHILLES.
385 My mind is troubled, like a fountain stirr’d;
386 And I myself see not the bottom of it.
387 [_Exeunt Achilles and Patroclus_.]
388 THERSITES.
389 Would the fountain of your mind were clear again, that I might water an
390 ass at it. I had rather be a tick in a sheep than such a valiant
391 ignorance.
392 [_Exit_.]